that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
