Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
