I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
