i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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