wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
