so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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