I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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