He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
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