The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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