did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
