Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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