My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
He felt like a one man threesome
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
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