this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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