You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Randomize
