Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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