Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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