apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize