white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
