fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
