I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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