He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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