just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize