Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
