I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
