I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
