Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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