Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
