i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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