Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
He shit in the fireplace
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