She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
