Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
