you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
