Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
