Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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