imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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