last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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