Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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