Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
