Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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