Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Farmville is her only friend.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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