Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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