Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
