grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Randomize
