We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
It's rum buckets o'clock
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize