I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
