dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Randomize
