Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
