we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
