I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
