If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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