Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
